Love – it is undoubtedly the most widely discussed topics any where in the world. Love knows no language, is not limited by any boundaries and when you are in love, you cannot deny the fact that it is the most beautiful thing that could ever happen to you.
Love is more giving than receiving; more listening than speaking; more ‘we’, ‘ours’ and ‘us’ than ‘me’, ‘mine’ and ‘I’. Though it is discussed and thought of so much about, nobody has ever come to coherent conclusion about ‘what’ love really is. That’s probably because, love comes in various forms. Love that parents have towards her children, or that siblings have for each other, or even the love which you have for that special person in life.
Following is my understanding of what love is. It is more generalization of true love and I won’t be delving into the forms of love because I believe that all forms of love have a lot in common – which I try to explain here.
So what is love? According to me Love depends on five parameters: Acceptance, Surrender, Freedom, Understanding and Time. Sounds weird? Read on…
Love is acceptance
When you are in love, you accept the person completely knowing very well that the person isn’t perfect (believe me no one is). Also, more importantly, you accept the person for what he/she is and not what he/she can become. Acceptance is unconditional. In true love, you don’t hear: “I love you but I hate your singing” or “I love you but I can’t stand your parents”. Because, when you truly accept someone, you will also love what that person loves. You learn to accept their mistakes, forgive and also forget. Forgetting is very important, because if you cannot forget, it will never be able to forgive.
Acceptance also defines responsibility. You feel responsible for the welfare of that person. You take measures to ensure that the person is healthy, happy and safe. Another very important aspect to be mentioned here is the fact that you do not see the necessity to change yourself consciously. You will automatically change when you realize that some of your actions are disheartening the other person. And most likely these changes are mutual and happen at a subtler level, and almost always go unnoticed.
Love is surrender
Why do you think they call it ‘falling’ into love? That is because you surrender yourself completely to the will of that person. Anything they do/say/think will seem the best. Surrender does not mean you are becoming a slave. Surrender really means that you are placing the person above your ego. You are becoming less selfish and less self-centered towards that person.
It also means that you are ready to compromise and adapt to situations when necessary, which by the way, is very important to any relationship.
Love is freedom
Love is free, like a bird. You cannot expect a caged bird to love you. Set the bird free, if you really love it, the bird will surely come back to you. In love, freedom means that you do not feel you are superior and try to dominate over the person. Instead, you set them free; and make sure that they are safe whatever they are doing or wherever they are going. Trying to be over possessive is really not the way. By granting freedom, you do not hear yourself say, “I don’t like you doing this”. Also, you do not resort to emotional blackmail, “It will hurt me if you do this”.
Love is understanding
Belief, trust, loyalty and understanding are the pillars of any relationship. And understanding is the most important of them all. When you are in love, you’ll know that whatever the other person does, always has something good in it for you. Small issues, which are inevitable, are handled without a word of disagreement. And consensus conclusions are arrived at, while making important decisions. Mistakes are forgiven (and forgotten) without a word of dissent or blame.
Also, in love there is unconditional support. You believe the person completely and back him/her till the end even if the idea seems far fetched. Constant motivation and encouragement is always present, this not only boosts the self-confidence, makes them happy and stress-free, but also gives them the security of being in safe hands and allows them to move forward without fear.
Love is time
Time is a commodity that is becoming very scarce nowadays. Days are flying by, years are rolling on without a notice. For the present generation, which is taken in by the technological advancements and the sophisticated working environment, it has become very hard to even make a few hours each day for our loved ones. Love is something that thrives on time. You always try hard to make time for each other, in spite of busy work schedules. You will be longing to see the other’s face at the end of the day, like a mother who waits at the doorstep for her children to return home from school.
In the end, love is what makes life beautiful and worth living for. 🙂
7 responses to “What is love?”
love is constant,
love is not dependent.
In love exists a truth,
it is the best fruit,
yet we call ourselves
sinners,for having eaten it.
All the world is with love
and hate a better part of it.
If love ceases,so does the world,
and in love there is no unity,
only love will survive,
if survival need be.
Love is not desire,
yet it is desired by.
love is not accepting,
and love has no understanding.
Love has only one,
divided into two.
Love is blind,
and there is nothing kind.
Love is love
and it is the purest.
Very nice poem Vishesh. 🙂
But there is a lot of it between people in love. 🙂
Love is the passion, the most beautiful feeling in this world, is also the pleasure to do something. All this can be love. ❤
probably this is the one which bridges the ‘Limited’ with the ‘Unlimited’… Very well put… 🙂
I guess a wonderful poem would surely compliment the above mentioned understanding of Love (beautifully put): An attempt by ‘E-Genuineness’
jahaan haar mein jeet hai,
aur jeet mein haar hai,
yehi toh pyar hai ,
bas yehi toh pyar hai.
pyar mein acha aur bura nahi hota,
pyar mein saahey aur galat nahi hota,
joo hota hai bas pyar hota hai,
aur pyar ke siwaai kuch nahi hota.
adhurey rishton sey kissi ko kabhi pyar nahi milta,
jhooth keyy sahare mein pyar kabhi kisiko nahi milta,
jo miltey adhurey rishton mein pyar ki mithass,
toh duniya mein pyar ke siwaai aur kuch nahi milta.
jab dard mein khushi hoo,
aur khushi mein aasooon,
inn aasoon key khushi mein joh pyar panapta hai,
iss pyar ko dard kaun pahuchaye,
jab iss pyar ka janam heyy dard mein hota hai.
pyar ko log aaj kitna nufrat kartey hain,
itna nafrat kartey hai key nafrat ko heey pyar kartey hain,
agar isshey tarah haar nafrat mein chupa hoo pyar,
toh log nafrat seyy kyun…pyar seyy kyun pyar nahi kartey hain?
kuch loog pyar sey darr teyy theey,
kuch loog pyar mein dartey hain,
yeh kaisa pyar jiskey darr mein jeetey hoo,
yeh kaisa pyar jisme darr key jeetey hoo,
kyunki pyar toh harr darr ka jawaab hota hai,
kyunki sirf pyar heyy toh harr darr seyy paare hota hai.
logg pyar mein matlaab dhundtey hain,
magar pyar toh bematlaab hota hai,
(kyunki)agar hota hai pyar mein matlab koi,
toh woh pyar nahi dhoka hota hai.
pyar toh harr rog ka illaz hota hai,
magar pyar sey bada kya rog hota hai ?
yeh kaisa rog hai jiska illaz heey nahi hota hai,
magar ek aisa rog jo harr rog ka illaz hota hai.
aur kitna likhun pyar ke baarein mein
raat ke saadey teen bajney koo aaye
jo likhungi toh log murakh kahengey
waise bhi main murakh kahaan
mujhse murakh toh woh jo pyar key naam iss kavita ko padhengey
kyunki agar log padh keyy kavita pyar samajh jaatey
toh main kyun leekhti
joo main leekhkey naa samajhpayi
woh tum padhkey kya samajhlogey…
Truly wonderful! Oh, how beautifully you have described love! Thank you very very much! 🙂
With your permission I’d like to translate this poem sometime.
Thank you for stopping by. 🙂
Well it was a snowy Evening so had to!!! 😀 . Would be anxiously awaiting its translation… Keep blogging and writing more… Thank You for liking!!! 🙂